Monkey Island Series – El Pollo Diablo Nuggets & Super Slaw

So in honor of International Talk Like a Pirate Day, we’ll be taking a look into the one of the best point-and-click series in gaming history. That’s right, land lubbers and grog-guzzlers, I be talking about the Monkey Island Series!

In these games ye play the above-board and awkward pirate wannabe, Guybrush Threepwood. This man be having only two things workin’ for him – the ability to hold his breath underwater for ten minutes, and the love of the smokin’ hot Governor of Mêlée Island™ – Elaine Marley.It be not said whether the first be directly related to the other! However thanks to a wee bit o’ ingenuity, and an ocean of dumb luck, Guybrush time and time again defeats Elaine’s evil undead ex-boyfriend, the dread pirate Captain LeChuck. In the face of danger, tis certain Threepwood will face it –whether by swordfighting a witty insults, or by combining objects like grog breathmints and rubber chickens with a pulleys in the middle.

Today’s inspired recipes come from the third game in the series, The Curse of Monkey Island. At one point in yer quest, ye come upon Blondbeard’s Chicken Shoppe in the town of Puerto Pollo on Plunder Island. It be owned by hook and oven mitt-wearin’ Captain Blondebeard, whose specialties include fried chicken and super slaw.

T’would be lucrative, but the man be plagued by a monstrous chicken known as El Pollo Diablo, who frees all of his chickens at night.

“El Pollo Diablo, the Giant Demon Chicken! Tall as a man and twice as powerful, his massive drumsticks propel him through the dark jungle with ease. No one has seen the Beast, but on the eve of the full moon… …his blood-curdling squawk can be heard from every corner of this wretched island. In the dark of night, he roosts patiently… watching… waiting… for the one day…He roams the island, exacting terrible vengeance on those who would capture and eat his smaller brethren.”
-Voodoo Lady

This recipe explores the question “What would Blondebeard do if he just happened to defeat El Pollo Diablo?” He’s a pirate in the Monkey Island Universe; he’d keelhaul it in some grog, of course! What be grog, ye ask? Well according to the games it be:

a secret mixture that contains one or more of the following: Kerosene, Propylene Glycol, Artificial Sweeteners, Sulfuric Acid, Rum, Acetone, Battery Acid, red dye#2, Scumm, Axle grease and/or pepperoni.

In history, it was a sailor’s water ration mixed with alcohol (usually rum) to stave off the foulness of stagnation. Later versions used lime or lemon juice and sugar or molasses to sweeten it, and as a side effect, prevented scurvy with vitamin C. Pirates and merchantmen actually favored bumbo, grog’s sweeter cousin. However, considerin’ that the Monkey Island series also features talkin’ skulls, used-ship salesmen, and piratical pyramid schemes, I think we can afford some anachronisms. So first here’s how t’make to some palatable (non-toxic) grog that ye will also be using for your marinade.

To be fittin’ to its name, we’ll be adding a bit o’ brimstone to this demon chicken dish in the form of some smokey chipotle pepper, and breading it using coconut milk and Caribbean jerk seasoning. To cool it down, we have a creamy Cilantro-Grog Dipping Sauce. Since no dish at Blondebeard’s is complete without it, we’ll also be whipping up some Super Slaw on the side. The seaweed be optional (not pictured since my first mate was not keen on the addition), but feel free to try it if ye be feelin’ adventurous.